The gospel also answers the question of who we are. “To those who believe in his name, he gave the right to become children of God - children born not of natural descent, not of human decision or a husband’s will, but born of God” (John 1:12). Before Christ, we had no option but to make a name for ourselves or assume some identity from our culture or work. As new believers we, “Have put on a new self, which is being renewed in knowledge in the image of its Creator. Here there is no Greek or Jew, circumcised or uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave or free, but Christ is all, and in all” (Colossians 3:11). John writes, “How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And this is what we are” (1 John 3:1).
Understanding what it means to be a child of God is a core belief for every Christian. Freedom In Christ Ministries and now Freedom In Christ Ministries has had the privilege of helping people all over the world resolve their personal and spiritual conflicts and find their freedom in Christ. I began to notice that every defeated Christian had one thing in common. None of them knew who they were “in Christ” nor understood what it means to be a child of God. If the, “Holy Spirit testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children” (Rom. 8:16), why weren’t they sensing that? Paul wrote, “Because you are sons, God sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, the Spirit who calls out, Abba, Father” (Gal. 4:6). They did, however, experience the presence of their Heavenly Father after we helped them resolve their personal and spiritual conflicts through genuine repentance and faith in God.
Being a new creation in Christ has profound implications for discipleship counseling for at least six reasons. First, we can positively and truthfully affirm the believers we are working with. Second, we have the assurance of victory since the life of Christ is within them. Third, we are not trying to build our lives into other people; we are helping to establish the life of Christ within them. Fourth, we have the internal presence of the wonderful counselor and the guidance of the Holy Spirit, both in ourselves and the Christians we are helping. Fifth, nothing can keep any of us from being the people God created us to be. Sixth, who we are is not determined by what we do. What we can potentially do is determined by who we are in Christ and by the beliefs we have in God and His Word.
We all have slightly different roles to play in life, but we carry out those roles as children of God. Notice how this applies to marriage. “Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers” (1 Peter 3:7). In a Christian marriage, both husband and wife are children of God and should be respected as such and treated accordingly. When Paul led the run-away slave to Christ and sent him back to his earthly master, he was to be received as a “brother in the Lord” (Philemon 16). We live out the roles of husband, wife, master and slave as children of God, but such roles do not determine who we are.
Whether we consider ourselves saints or sinners is another important biblical truth related to identity. In the King James translation of the Bible, believers are called “saints,” “holy ones,” or “righteous ones” over 200 times. Believers are called saints because of their position in Christ, not because of their maturity and behavior. In contrast, unbelievers are called “sinners’ over 300 times. Clearly, the term “saint” is used in Scripture to refer to the believer and “sinner” is used in reference to the unbeliever. At the core of every believer is a righteous seed that God has sown. It is counterproductive to identify Christians as sinners and then expect them to act as saints. If you are just a sinner, then what do sinners do? No person can consistently behave in a way that is inconsistent with what they believe about themselves. As Christians we are not trying to become children of God (saints). We are children of God who are becoming like Christ. We are not working for our salvation. We are working it out (Philippians 2:12). That is why it is so important to understand positional sanctification (what God has already accomplished for us and who we already are in Christ), and progressive sanctification (making real in our experience what is already true about us).
Our position and identity in Christ is the basis for living and growing “in Christ.” Sanctification is the consistent practical outworking of what it means to belong to the new creation in Christ. John Stott wrote in God’s Good News for the World (Downer’s Grove, IL: IVP, 1994), page 187:
So, in practice we should constantly be reminding ourselves who we are. We need to learn to talk to ourselves, and ask ourselves questions: “Don’t you know? Don’t you know the meaning of conversion and baptism? Don’t you know that you have been united to Christ in his death and resurrection? Don’t you know that you have been enslaved to God and have committed yourself to His obedience? Don’t you know these things? Don’t you know who you are?” We must go on pressing ourselves with such questions, until we reply to ourselves: “Yes, I do know who I am, a new person in Christ, and by the grace of God I shall live accordingly.”
Knowing who we are in Christ and understanding what it means to be a child of God makes an incredible difference when working with struggling Christians. For instance, many Christians have abused the use of alcohol and drugs to the point of being addicted. But their addiction does not define “who” they are. Sitting in groups and repeating a failure identity is counterproductive to their recovery. It is correct and necessary for the struggling Christian to say, “I am a child of God who struggles with alcohol or drugs.” Recovery in Christ requires them to walk in the light (1 John 1:7) and speak the truth in love (Ephesians 4:25). The only thing a Christian must admit to is the truth, and that is the first step in recovery. “If we say we have no sin, we are deceiving ourselves and the truth is not in us” (1 John1:8). It is important to understand that, “having sin” and “being sin” are two totally different concepts. God had to change who we are at the very core of our being. We have to assume our responsibility to live out that salvation as children of God. “For you were once darkness, but now you are children of light in the Lord. Live as children of light” (Ephesians 5:8).
There is a major difference between saying, “I have a problem child,” and saying, “My child has a problem.” If you have a problem child, the only way to get rid of the problem is to get rid of the child. But if your child has a problem, hopefully you can help him/her solve the problem without calling into question who they are. The same reasoning follows for our growth in Christ. Sinful behaviors are reflections of our immaturity and failure to assume responsibility for our own attitudes and actions, not who we are in Christ.
The need to reinforce our identity and position in Christ is especially true for those who struggle with addictive behaviors. These Christians are not alcoholics or addicts, they are children of God. Believing the truth that they are new creations in Christ is key to their passage out of bondage. To overcome their addictive behaviors, they must continuously choose to believe they are, “alive in Christ and dead to sin” (Romans 6:11). The secular world has taught them to believe that alcoholism is a disease that they will have all their lives. The recovery process begins when we help them resolve their personal and spiritual conflicts, and find their identity, position and freedom in Christ. Then we need to show them how their needs are met in Christ, how to live their lives by faith in the power of the Holy Spirit and then they will not carry out the desire of their flesh (Galatians. 5:16). For more on this subject read, Overcoming Addictive Behaviors (Regal Books, 2003), and Finding Freedom In A Sex-Obsessed World, (Harvest House, 2003).
The same reasoning holds for homosexuality. There is no such thing as a homosexual person. God created us male and female. There are homosexual behaviors, feelings, and tendencies, but that is not “who” they are. Establishing a true identity is the first step in overcoming homosexuality. “Once a sinner always a sinner” is not true if you understand and believe the gospel, nor is “once an alcoholic always an alcoholic,” or “once a homosexual always a homosexual.” The world teaches that, because they have no gospel. Without the gospel we will continue to apply such labels and allow people to remain products of their past. Nobody can fix our past. God doesn’t even do that. He sets us free from it by making us new creations in Christ. Believers get their identity from their spiritual heritage, not their physical/natural heritage. That is why Paul prays in Eph. 1:18, “I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which He has called you, the riches of the glorious inheritance in the saints.”
Without the gospel, the best we can do is help those with mental health problems learn to cope, live more responsibly and try by human effort to abstain from negative thinking and behavior. Secular programs admonish their clients to, “Work the program, the program works.” But the best programs in the world, including Christian ones, can’t set anyone free, and good works can’t either. Only Christ can set us free. The goal in recovery has to be more than abstinence. If that were the goal, then Ephesians 5:18 would read, “Be not drunk with wine, therefore stop drinking.” The answer is to be filled with the Spirit, because where the “Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom” (2 Corinthians 3:18).
We are not saved by how we behave. We are saved and sanctified by what we believe. Changing a counselee’s behavior without changing what he/she believes can only lead to legalism and drivenness or rebellion. Rules without relationships lead to rebellion. Any message or program that advocates only a change in behavior with external accountability will fall way short in the end. It may allow them to cope better in society, but it cannot liberate them.
Just abstaining from aberrant behavior is not enough for another reason. People without Christ choose sinful behaviors in order to cope, deal with their pain, get rid of their inhibitions, and satisfy the lusts of their flesh. Take the alcohol away from the alcoholic, and all you have is a dry drunk. These people have legitimate needs, but they are attempting to meet them in all the wrong ways.
There is no such thing as a single diagnosis for people with addictive behaviors. They don’t have a sex or drinking problem, they have a life problem, and they all struggle with guilt, depression, anxiety, fear, anger, and a poor self-image.
Satan takes advantage of those who do not have their needs met in Christ working through the lust of the eyes, the lust of the flesh, and the boastful pride of life. The purpose of every temptation is an attempt to get us to live our lives independently from God. For every temptation God has provided a way of escape (1 Corinthians 10:13). It is a lot easier to find the way of escape if you know who you are in Christ and understand how He will meet all your needs according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:19, emphasis added). The most critical needs are the being needs (life, identity, acceptance, security, and significance). The following list is from my book, Who I Am In Christ (Regal Books, 2001), which was written to help struggling Christians know who they are and how those “being” needs are met “in Christ.”
In Christ I am Accepted:
Jn. 1:12
Jn. 15:15
Rom. 5:1
1Cor. 6:17
1Cor. 6:20
1Cor. 12:27
Eph. 1:1
Eph. 1:5
Eph. 2:18
Col. 1:14
Col. 2:10
I am secure:
Rom. 8:1,2
Rom. 8:28
Rom. 8:31
Rom. 8:35
2Cor. 1:21
Col. 3:3
Phil. 1:6
Phil. 3:20
2Tim. 1:7
Heb. 4:16
1Jn. 5:18
I am significant.
Matt. 5:13
Jn. 15:1,5
Jn. 15:16
Acts 1:8
1Cor. 3:16
2Cor. 5:17
2Cor. 6:1
Eph. 2:6
Eph. 2:10
Eph. 3:12
Phil. 4:13 |
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I am God's child
I am Christ's friend
I have been justified
I am united with the Lord and one with Him in spirit
have been bought with a price--I belong to God
am a member of Christ's body
I am a saint
I have been adopted as
God's child
I have direct access to God through the Holy Spirit
I have been redeemed and forgiven of all my sins
I am complete in Christ
I am free from condemnation
I am assured that all things work together for good
I am free from any condemning charges against me
I cannot be separated from the love of God
I have been established, anointed, and sealed by God
I am hidden with Christ in God
I am confident that the good work that God has begun in me will be perfected
I am a citizen of heaven
I have not been given a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a sound mind
I can find grace and mercy in time of need
I am born of God and the evil one cannot touch me
I am the salt and light
of the earth
I am a branch of the true vine, a channel of His life
I have been chosen and appointed to bear fruit
I am a personal witness of Christ's
I am God's temple
am a minister of reconciliation
I am God's co-worker
I am seated with Christ in the heavenly realm
I am God's workmanship
I may approach God with freedom and confidence
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me |